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Ugly Piano

from Obliterate​/​Ugly by Alien Clouds

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about

written autumn 2019. reflections on five years prior.

lyrics

Gather secrets, hide them in a cage under my chest
Looking best in red eye-shadow and a charity shop dress
The city looks like nothing gazing down from eight floors up
I make a dismal list of reasons why I shouldn’t want to jump

This is mine, this is mine, this is mine, this is mine
This is mine, this is mine, this is mine, this is mine

The sleeping pills are cheaper than I previously thought
I scuttle like a spider under fear of being caught
No shame in being sad but scared to get essential help
I couldn’t face the pain, I couldn’t recognise myself

This is mine, this is mine, this is mine, this is mine
Not a man and that’s fine, this is mine, this is mine
There is joy in this life, rather die than deny
This is mine, this is mine, I’ll pretend that it’s fine

The songs I thought would resonate are far too on the nose
If this is not to be enshrined then let it just erode
Sometimes I’d rather die than live a life that’s insincere
But right now all I hope for is to burn and disappear

credits

from Obliterate​/​Ugly, released May 8, 2020

license

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Alien Clouds Manchester, UK

emo-folk for emo folks

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